2011: Let Me Sum Up

I just spent the last 36 hours straight in bed with a feverish kid. I woke up this morning and my back and shoulders hurt so badly I could barely move (when he’s sick, he wants to be held, so I’ve been in all sorts of weird configurations) but the kid was better, so yay! Except then, apropos of nothing, he threw up all over the living room.

This, I think, is a perfect encapsulation of 2011: the year of suck. Just when you think things are going to get better, you’re cleaning half-digested Cheerios off the carpet.

It wasn’t all bad. Our new book came out, and it rocks out loud. We moved to Sellwood, where we have friendly neighbors and a yard and a house that no one lives above. The kid started kindergarten (!!!), which is just crazy talk, because wasn’t he just a tiny little thing that I could fit under my chin? And we got a new cat, because cats are all good things, even when they pee on the rug, Maru.

So, yeah. Not all bad.

The rest of it was pretty roundly awful, to varying degrees, and who wants to hear about that? Instead I will just refer you to the encapsulated version, above.

I’m not doing any resolutions this year. Fuck resolutions. I’m just working on getting out of bed on a regular basis. Honestly, when you find yourself saying things like “No, I get dressed most days,” there might be some sort of issue there. And maybe not having to declare bankruptcy. That might be awesome, too. (Or maybe bankruptcy is awesome, and I’ll be all, you guys, why didn’t you tell me how great bankruptcy is? And you’ll be all, dude, you just screwed yourself out of all your credit cards, and then I will cry.)

Next year will have to be better, because honestly how could it not? That’s how optimism works, right?

Happy New Year, kids!

This is my resolved face

Usually my New Year’s resolutions are sort of cribbed together at the last minute and comprised of various levels of wishful thinking. Not this year! This year, I’m taking All The Reasons 2010 Sucked (TM) and using them as a base for some make-my-life-better resolutions. Not unlike a roux. A roux of suck.


1. I will write for two hours every weekday.

2. I will EXERCISE. (Yes I know, this is on my list every year.) Not So got me a 5-class gift certificate to Barre 3, my absolute favorite exercise studio anywhere ever, which means I totally don’t have any excuse to slack. At least for a little while.

3. I will set up a budget and stick to it. 2010 (Which Sucked (TM)) was the year we went into crazy debt when business dried up, and though it would have sucked any way you slice it, having some backup in the form of savings would have kept me slightly more sane for the duration. I think. Maybe it wouldn’t. Maybe money problems will ALWAYS make me into a crazy person. Clearly the only solution is to become disgustingly wealthy.


1. No more friends as clients. Friends + work = not mixy. (This is not to say I don’t become friends with my clients. I love that! But the other way around is just a recipe for doom.)

2. No more working for the weekend. Loverboy may have rocked the red leather pants*, but I vow to save weekends for other things, like sleeping and hanging out with my husband and my kid. And crocheting, which I did way too little of in 2010.

3. No more working on the cheap. I read somewhere that designers should do projects for full price or for free – never at a discount. Initially I scoffed, but now I’m kind of thinking that article was onto something. I’ve got sort of a half-baked plan to set aside a certain number of hours for pro-bono stuff that maybe I’ll offer to worthy causes or something. Something.

4. I will hire some sort of accounting/bookkeeping/numbers person to deal with the stuff I don’t know how to deal with, i.e. anything related to taxes. DONE! Look at that, it’s barely the new year and I’ve already checked something off. Woot!

*Yes. I totally just made an early-80s Loverboy reference that no one under 30 will get. I AM OFFICIALLY OLD.

resolve face

Happy New Year, internets! It’s an even-numbered year, which always makes me feel vaguely twitchy, but I have high hopes for 2008. If I knew anything about numerology I’d probably have something pithy to say about the auspiciousness of all the numbers adding up to 1, but I don’t, so I’ll just…move on to something I do know about. Like resolutions! I resolve things. I do. And sometimes I actually do the things I resolve. More often not, since I tend to forget my resolutions by roughly January 2, and don’t remember them again until the last days in December, when…well, it’s a bit too late to lose 20lbs by that time, yes?

So in an effort to keep this year’s resolutions in the running, I give you my list:

* Finish at least one novel (incl. rewrites – I technically *finished* at least one during NaNoWriMo, but it needs to be reworked, to put it mildly) and submit to agents
* Exercise at least 2x/week
* Schedule 2 afternoons/week to devote to playing/spending time with the kid
* End next year with at least $5000 in our savings account (current balance: 68 cents)

I feel like there ought to be more in there, like “Get thee to therapy!” or “Learn to Salsa!” but I’m going with what I have. Optimism! Optimism is my friend.

Except maybe there should be something in there about my hair.